#TradPickupLines, the prequel

Yesterday the Catholic Twitter community came up with some great jokes about super-traditional dating, and Elizabeth has graciously chronicled all the Trad Pickup Lines that emerged. It was great to see everyone's creativity. Patrick Madrid's Top Ten Orthodox Catholic Pickup Lines are funny, but that list has been around since I was in high school, and new awkward advances continue to be made in the field of religion/romance.
Don't get me wrong, dating someone who shares your faith is a wonderful thing. On our first date as a "Facebook official" couple, The Beau and I went to Sunday Mass and then took photos of headstones in an historic churchyard. It was awesome. But along the way to finding a person who will share your doubts, joys, and prayers, you will have probably have some awkward conversations. There's meeting new people, and then there's going up to every girl in the confession line and saying "Are you my vocation?" like a lost Dr. Seuss character.

For example, how this all started was that the other day someone told brand-new convert Kassie that she had a face made for a mantilla and tiny piano player hands. Seriously.

She, Jackie and I then speculated what this Latin-Mass-loving young man was really trying to say:

Would you like to glorify God through traditional gender roles with me?
Excuse me, I think you have the rib I'm missing. Would you like to help me promote the culture of life?
You were created to be my helpmeet. Let's subdue the earth together
Let's raise a quiver full of traditionalist culture warriors.
Would you like to break the bread that you baked with me?
Would you like to not practice NFP with me?
Let's change your headcovering from white to black.(Married women wear black mantillas.)

and my personal favorite...
"I'm bringing Latin back. Them new mass boys don't know how to act....[yeah]."