Ten Facts about Me and The Beau

Betty Beguiles has this fun feature "about me and my better half" going on her blog, so I though I'd join in. Here are some fun facts about me and The Beau, who's really been deserving a better explanation for a while.

1. He's a New Orleans native, I'm a Virginian. So how did we end up long-distance dating in the northeast? Grad school and the OK Cupid dating website. 
2. He got my attention in his first email message by asking if I'd seen the new Sense and Sensibility adaptation. (He later admitted this was a calculated move.) Then I got his attention by agreeing that William III and Mary II totally stole the English throne from her Catholic father James II. Thus a history nerd romance was born. 
3. Our first date was on the feast of the Assumption, August 15, 2009. Meeting for coffee and dinner turned into six hours of conversation before he finally drove back to New Jersey. 
4. His blog nickname comes from the brief period before we were "Facebook official" and I needed some way to describe "That guy who drove 2 hours to meet me at Brew-Ha-Ha" to my classmates. "The Beau" seemed appropriately olde timey. 
5. We both love photography, so many of our early dates involved taking pictures in parks and on my museum grounds. Then my DSLR broke and school got crazy, so we need to get back into that.
6. Before we met he didn't know anything about gluten-intolerance, but he's been amazingly supportive about it. He's even gotten me to be more assertive asking about ingredients in restaurants! The day we figured out how to make gumbo with a GF roux was a big victory. 
7. He went to Jesuit High School in New Orleans, so the Jesuits are a big part of his spirituality. I've got a Vincentian background, so we educate each other. 
8. Due to geographic distance, our moms have never met, but we are pretty sure they are almost the same person. Bonus: my mom was taught by Jesuits at SLU, his mom has a Vincentian confessor. 
9. This summer and fall he will be in London doing history dissertation research. At first I dreaded it horribly, but I've gradually become more peaceful about it and more excited for him to have this opportunity. 
10. Ever since our third date (when we became Facebook official) we like to hold hands during the homily at Mass - except when he's in the choir loft at his parish.

Thesis survival soundtrack

I've always relied on music to get me through major school projects. Of course, like my brain, my playlists are full of eclectic randomness. When my Dad and I  were filling out my college applications, we listened to a lot of Avril Lavigne and B. B. King. In undergrad, there was a lot of old-school U-2, Ace of Base, and The Clash. At my job in St. Louis, I relied on Queen's "Under Pressure" , Ingrid Michaelson, and Coldplay's Viva La Vida album.

Maybe I'm getting older and more mellow, but female vocalists have been the staple of grad school. Regina Spektor is a major current favorites. I love her unusual voice, and how she rocks her curly hair in different cute styles. Her retelling of the Samson story seems to fit my obscure religious history research.

"And the history books forgot about us

And the Bible didn't mention us

And the Bible didn't mention us

Not even once."

Jane Eyre: feminist chastity warrior?

Part of my Virginia weekend was seeing the new Jane Eyre film with one of my best girlfriends from high school. I hadn't read the book since we were in plaid uniform skirts, so I'd forgotten what a killer heroine Jane is. This time around I was really impressed by her moral fiber. I'm a big Elizabeth Bennett fan, but Jane has Lizzie's wit plus spiritual depth. I loved how Cary Fukanaga's adaptation prominently featured the novel's different religious ideas.  We even get to see Jane and the housekeeper saying grace over lunch! Here's how I found Jane Eyre an inspiring example of spiritual strength.

• She is mistreated by many people during her horrible childhood, but she doesn't let their wrongs destroy her. As a child, she rightly calls out Aunt Read for hypocrisy and cruelty, but eventually forgives her. 
• At Lowood school and later at the Rivers family home, she turns to her female friends for support and encouragement. 
• She doesn't need a man to survive - she's happy to work hard and support herself, even in a humble job at a country school. 
• When she does settle down, it's for a relationship of mutual self-giving and improvement. She won't settle just for being someone's assistant, no matter how noble his life goals. 
• Experiences with insanely dogmatic Christians doesn't turn her off from religion entirely. In fact, she leaves the man she loves rather than violate her moral code. 

It's on that last point that I found this version of Jane Eyre most inspiring. The scene where she refuses to live in bigamy with Mr. Rochester is so poignant, and I loved how this film depicted it. In the 2006 Masterpiece Theater version, Rochester is in control, actually lying on top of Jane in an attempt to persuade her by making out. It seemed too over-the-top for me. In Fukunaga's version, Jane is the stronger one. She holds her head up high and keeps Rochester at arm's length while he clings to her, broken down by his past mistakes.  It's obvious she desperately wants to be with him, but, as she so wisely puts it, "I must respect myself." With a cry of "God help me!" she flees the room of temptation and heartbreak.

As a single Catholic twenty-something, I was heartened by her determined fidelity to what Rochester called "some arbitrary man's law." On the surface, it might seem like she needlessly destroyed her own happiness, but staying at Thornfield would have cost the integrity that made her so attractive to Rochester in the first place. Her self-respect is what made her a survivor; she certainly would not have been happy if she compromised it. Jane's moral courage in turn brought out the best in Rochester; he stayed loyal and compassionate to his first wife to the end of that woman's life. I was heartened to see Jane not let her emotions get in the way of her values since, let's be honest, chastity can be hard when you genuinely love someone. 

source

All in all, it's no surprise Jane Eyre continues to be a feminist icon to generations of readers. She's brave, long suffering, intelligent, self-sufficient and hardworking, a warrior for true virtue, but also capable of great love. 

The District's siren song

This weekend I got to go home to Virginia for a weekend's worth of spring break. (Thanks to thesis a week off just means more time to edit.) It was a great break that involved attending a Confirmation Mass, pigging out on barbeque, being the only table of white people in a legit Cantonese restaurant, and catching up with girlfriends from high school and my VSC year.

From anadelmann's Flickr

There was also a lot of driving. On Saturday morning, I dropped Brother #1 off for a flight at Reagan National, and on the drive back I could see the DC skyline in the distance. Something about the outline of the Washington Monument and Capitol building always makes my heart skip a beat. There were even cherry trees blooming! Oh DC, why must you tease me so? Part of me really, really wants to work there next year. I want to Metro downtown every morning, reading library books and being part of the commuter hustle. I want to cook dinner for my parents and to see my brothers serve at Sunday Mass.I want to have a young adult church community.  I want to see my old friends on the weekends. Part of me will always be left in the national capital area. Whenever I go back there, life makes more sense and my faith is stronger; I feel safe, optimistic,and  inspired.

Museums in Movies: Vertigo

At The Beau's request, here are my thoughts on Vertigo, the Hitchcock film we watched this weekend. It's a bit more sinister than my last Museums in Movies installment. The theme of this movie is “Jimmy Stewart be creepin’.” Also “historic sites will try to haunt and kill you.” There are actually some similarities to When in Rome – obsessive love, charmed and cursed objects – but here horror is the director’s intention, not a side effect of bad writing.Vertigo is complex enough for some genuine nerdtastic analysis.

Jimmy Stewart plays John Ferguson aka Scotty, a San Francisco police detective sidlined by the vertigo and acrophobia he recently developed on an intense suspect chase.  He's coping with forced retirement by hanging out with his platonic-but-not-really BFF Midge, who inhabits a modernist world that is too dull, practical, and safe. One of her design projects is a backless, strapless cantilever bra, reducing the mysterious female figure to engineering formulas. (And let’s be honest ladies – that contraption would never work.) Bertoia chairs and soothing Mozart aren’t enough to win Scotty’s heart. Poor Midge, like her Mattel namesake, she’ll always be the runner up.

Luckily, a commission from a old friend gets Scotty back in action. Gavin Elster's concerned that his wife Madeleine may be possessed by her Haunting Tragic Ancestor, and so hires Scotty to tail her. The world of the Elsters is more exciting and mysterious. It’s also color coded. When husband is in charge, we see red. His plush office carpet is tomato colored, and the dining room at Ernie’s Restaurant has some out of control ruby flocked wallpaper. Green is the wife’s signature color, at least when her identity is solid. She wears green outfits, drives an emerald car, and later appears near a lime neon sign. When things start to get hazy, she’s often clad in gray or earth tones.

Ok, you’re saying, enough about decorative arts; where’s the museum you promised me? Actually there are several historic places on display throughout the film. Historians and detectives do a lot of the same work, except the people scholars stalk are already dead. Scotty's travels around San Francisco looking for information are a lot like the scavenger hunt that is historical research. Unlike this researcher, he has the uncanny ability to find perfect parking spots everywhere he goes.

Don't forget the sweet dec arts around the corner, ma'am!

First, there’s the art museum where Mrs. Elster goes to stare at the Haunting Tragic Ancestor Portrait of DOOM. Thanks to Scotty’s visual acuity, he notices that her hair and flowers are the same as those in the painting. A+ for connoisseurship, pal! As a reward, he gets a free catalog from a cheerful security guard. For reals? Parking at this museum is awesome too – he just pulls up at the front curb.I want to go on a field trip there. 

Second, Madeleine heads to another favorite primary source - a cemetery. She pauses to stare at the Haunting Tragic Ancestor Grave of FOREBODING. Scotty wisely takes notes on the inscription afterwards, instead of taking a rubbing of of the stone and potentially damaging its surface. A+ for conservation!

Then, the lady in gray leads him to the Historic House Hotel of MYSTERY. This house has late 19th century aesthetic movement furnishings - did it seem stale and dated to 1960s audiences, or charming and olde timey? Either way, Scotty is too busy extorting information from Ellen Corby the desk lady to look for clues in the interiors. C for decorative arts appreciation, you're slipping. 

Luckily Scotty redeems himself by interviewing Midge's friend the bookstore owner about Haunting Tragic Ancestor. A+ for oral history records, and he's back in my good graces. 

Then Madeleine makes her Ophelia-like leap into San Francisco Bay, and while she's recovering Scotty gets her to spill about the Historic Mission Town of NIGHTMARES. That's it, time for a roadtrip to the living history village. When they get there she lures him into the Livery Stable of ADULTEROUS SMOOCHING, and has flashbacks about growing up in the ye olde days. And he's all "Honey, I know the brochure said you would step into life in the past, but this is weirding me out. Also, when was the last time you heard someone say 'livery stable' in everyday conversation?" Before he can get her out of the carriage and back into the 20the century, she makes a run for the Mission Bell Tower of DEATH and DIZZINESS, and that's when things really start to get crazy.

I won't spoil the rest, since the film's power lies in all the unanswered questions. What is reality? Who can be trusted? Is the past out to get us? Can Scotty use the power of fashion to manipulate womankind and his own heart? Were those real nuns or costumed interpreters?  

No matter the answers, Hitchcock gets an A++ for using the unknowns of history and the multiple meanings of objects to tell a spellbinding story.

Consider the lilies...at Target

It's been a rough week here in thesis-land, especially when I got rejected for a paid summer internship that seemed like the perfect deal. I could have increased skills I already have, I could have worked in DC, I could have lived with my parents and saved buckets of money. But now I won't, and I'm back in the pit of mystery that is the job market.

There are some Bible verses very appropriate for this stage of grad student life

"Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? So do not worry and say, 'What are we to eat?' or 'What are we to drink?' or 'What are we to wear?

(Matthew 6: 25, 31)

 

If God can look after the birds in the sky and clothe the lilies (and spring crocuses) of the field, then surely he will look after those of us foolish enough get advanced degrees in the liberal arts. I'm grateful for the small mercies that have come my way this week, like how I made an appointment today on time despite having to put air in my tires first. Or how when I went to exchange a needed pair of shoes at Target for a smaller size they had been marked down $6. It was like a little pat on the back from God, saying that things are going to be ok.

Vestment thoughts of the day

Sorry about the silence; I won't be posting too much in the coming weeks since we're in the throes of thesis draft finishing. The atmosphere in the library has already reached the level of giggling and pencil-case-throwing, so who knows how much sanity will be left when we reach by April 4.


I start giggling whenever the books I'm reading about Anglican church embroidery sound so very ... English. For example:
In 1920 Hinda M. Hands (tell me that is not a made-up name) warned about all the crazy silk colors available to modern altar guild ladies, since “without a cultivated ‘colour sense’, an embroider can run riot among an embarras de richesse with most disastrous results!” *Gasp.* My gracious! Although if you've ever looked at the blog Bad Vestments, you know this to be true. 


Augustus Welby Northmore Pugin (his awesome actual name) started the Gothic revival in the 1830s and was never tacky. He also eventually became Catholic, sadly disappointing Team Anglican. As a 1980s publication told me:  "Pugin – “that wonderful man” as [William] Burges always thought of him – had tainted the [ecclesiological] movement with a whiff of incense. [John] Ruskin supplied an anti-papal deodorant." Because Speed Stick is always a good analogy when talking about church aesthetics. 


In honor of St. Patrick, I'll leave you with some of my favorite green vestments I've studied. They're all stoles for some reason.

At St. Ignatius of Antioch, NYC

At Church of the Transfiguration, NYC

At St. Mark's Philadelphia

Third time's the charm

via Toothpaste for Dinner

We're in the middle of Interview Weekend for my grad program. Yeah, it's kinda like that. Except the vision quest is interrupted by free lunches, free dinners, and 2 hour tours of an 8 story museum that leaves you thinking "WHAT ON EARTH did I just see??"

This is my third time around in this experience, and it gets better every time. When I interviewed, I was a nervous wreck in the middle of questioning my purpose in life. Last year,  I was excited and relieved, and was really starting to feel like I belonged in my program. Now it's my third and final chance at all this wining and dining, and I'm just here to have fun. There's no pressure - I'm never going to share a library with the incoming class, and the first years are handling most of the organizational tasks. My class has been pretty preoccupied waiting to hear back about jobs, so all this fuss is a welcome distraction.

So I guess you can say this is the museum's and my second anniversary. I'm so grateful for the time I've had here, and feel proud of all I have learned. Big gatherings like this always make us students feel like we're part of a real community of scholars, where you can geek out over textiles or architecture at the lunch table, and where your colleagues really do want you to succeed. And if you can have kitchen dance parties in your off hours, then that's even better.

When I got home from my first Interview Weekend, I got a double fortune cookie.

Everywhere you choose to go, friendly faces will greet you.
Many pleasurable and memorable adventures are in store for you!

I think we can safely say that has come true.

...and so Lent is off and running

I'm in the library at 11pm trying to finish another thesis chapter. My brain refuses to cooperate. But that's nothing compared to other news.

A family friend is rapidly dying of stomach cancer, bravely resigned to the will of God.

The Archdiocese of Philadelphia just suspended 21 priests due to sexual abuse cases against them.

Frailty, death, and sin just keep happening.But it will be all right in the end.

And so Lent begins

I was born on an Ash Wednesday, and the day often feels more like a new beginning than my actual birthday. It's really the most refreshing holy day - it forces you to stop what you are doing and really assess the type of person you want to be. I'm all bogged down in mid-semester busy times, feeling like my life is getting out of control and wondering if I am doing anything right at all when BAM - here comes Ash Wednesday to remind me that there is a spiritual reality beyond today. That there are things more important than creature comforts and the luxury of cable tv. That nobody is perfect - in fact, we do bad things sometimes. That God is merciful, and that there is joy beyond suffering. That God made us "to know, love, and serve Him in this life, and to be happy with Him in the next." All He wants is for us to offer Him ourselves with all our confusion, weakness, and unhappiness.

My resolution for Lent is generally to be more mindful of these things. I won't keep the TV on mindlessly in the background; in fact, I won't watch Glee or Pretty Little Liars at all. I won't read so many fashion or pop culture blogs. I'll go to two daily Masses a week. I'll read more spiritual books.I'm actually a little excited to de-tox from the world. (The Beau shares my enthusiasm for Lenten self-improvement, just reason #457129 why I love him.)

Goodness knows I need fewer distractions right now. After getting ashes on my forehead, I'm spending the day with embroidered vestment motifs, and then art of colonial Spain, and then Hudson River Valley paintings. I'm awfully fond of the purple and black vestments in my thesis right now.

How about you? Do you like Ash Wednesday or dread it? What are you giving up this year?

7 Things I Love About Williamsburg

1. The smells - boxwood, musty buildings, honey almond soaps, the campfire aroma that has been stuck in my hair since we got to the historic area.
2. It's pretty much impossible to walk around DOG Street or the WM old campus and not have a great-looking building.in view.
3. The historic trades interpreters, who keep it real while wearing breeches and petticoats. In every shop you can hear snarky humor and funny stories about their past lives. They'll crack jokes at the blacksmith's expense, then tell you to visit their Facebook page.
4. The glee of introducing new people to the secret nook of goodness that is the Raleigh Tavern Bake Shop.
5. Using a pseudonym to help identify your sandwich order among the hordes at the Cheese Shop (which now has a gluten free bagel option, huzzah!)
6. Walking down DOG street at night while looking at the stars. 
7. No matter how many old friends I get to see, it always, always feels like coming home.

Accomplishment

After all my award acceptance speech pondering this weekend some very good things happened to me. Things that made me feel about as happy as if I had one of those gold statuettes in my hand.

First, thanks to Blogger's very addictive stats counter charts, I discovered that I set a new record for page views in February - over 700 hits! This is all thanks to you, readers, and I'm about as excited as if I won the lottery. Your comments and visits really brighten this weary grad student's day. Maybe one day we'll even break 1000...

Second, I completed a marathon late night thesis writing session fueled by hummus, pita chips, and some stale Valentine marshmallow peeps. When I came up for air at 3am, I discovered that I had churned out 12 whole pages. I'm really starting to feel like a writer now. Only one more section to go, and then I'll have a decent draft to work with. Just one step closer to my graduation/thesis presentation/awards speech.

The last thing was a complete surprise, and one that testifies to the power of grace more than my own abilities. On Sunday I got a Facebook message from an college friend who had worked with me at history camp one summer. We'd exchanged a few emails since then about what we were doing after graduation, but otherwise weren't really in touch. Anyway, this lovely girl, now a wife and new mother, was writing to say that she had been received into the Catholic Church, making her Confirmation and First Communion this past weekend. She was thanking all the people who had helped her along her journey and shared their faith with her.
I can't remember the last time I was so touched by an email. I'm so happy for my friend, and happy that for at least once in my life I helped bring someone closer to God. So often I wonder if I am witnessing to my faith as well as I could, if my dual existence in Catholicism and academia is even possible. That note was a reminder that it's all in God's hands, even the results of a few conversations in a humid undergrad dorm one Williamsburg summer.

Oh, speaking of Williamsburg, I'm going there tomorrow! My class is going to visit the trade shops and attempt to imitate the accomplishments of pre-industrial craftsmen like these guys. From what I have seen of my carpentry skills, the results will not be so award-winning.